6 Peoples That Determine Our Future
“You must take personal responsibility. You can’t change the circumstances, the seasons, or the wind, but you can change yourself.”
I often asked myself, “What would I be in the future? In the next 10 to 20 years, could I achieve everything I dreamt of?” From time to time, I always recheck my ‘mission statement’ which has been prepared since I came back from Le Tour de Sabah. However, I always wonder how I could achieve it all in the time limit. At the moment, I thought of every means or way to improve myself and gain everything that can help in determining my future. I realized that there are a lot of loopholes in my planning and it will unavoidably get me to nowhere. However, since last January, I find out one of the loopholes that I need to take care of.
Like me, some people wonder that although how hard they work to change their life and become better in the future, they are still at it. Of course not all people will stay at the old level but there is something that they lack of. First, it is triggered by lack of ‘heart’ to take action and second, people around them. For the first reason, I have written a lot about it and explaining about it will never end except to take it into action. However, for the second reason, it has its secondary effect towards the first reason and the effect is tremendous.
Robert T. Kiyosaki has mentioned in his book, Quadrant Cashflow, that ‘who you spend your time with is your future’. It is not a quote but it’s a fact. In one of hadith, it mentioned about the effect of a friend. If we befriend with people who sell perfumes, we will smell nice but if we make friends with an ‘iron maker’, we will smell horrible. If we think deeply, this hadith stress a lot about the importance of seeking true companions around us.
Before we go further, let’s take a piece of paper and jot down the name of six people we spend the most time with. The qualifier is based on who we spend the time most, not the type of relationship. I did the same thing in last January, and when I looked at it, I find out my biggest loopholes. I started to think but at the moment, I didn’t take action any action because I was preoccupied with something else. However, in last Mac, I re-opened back all my stuff and find this piece of paper. The second time I looked at it; it was not just with the realization but also the urgency feeling to act and did some changes on it. The list was pretty revealing once I began to look below the surface. At the same time, I gained insights about myself that I liked and even more that I did not like.
Therefore, I re-wrote the list, made a change on it, and vow to myself to start spend more time with these kinds of people in the future. It turned out to be like this:
- My family
- Friends & anyone who has similar mission like me in their life; I can simply say friends who has same ‘fikrah’ with me
- Al-Quran & hadith, books, magazines, journals & everything that will help me to gain my insight (affective domain) & outsight (cognitive domain)
- Doctors, physicians, researchers; anyone related to medical field
- Other professionals especially anyone who has expertise in business, investing, financial plan and bank management that can help me towards financial freedom
The list did not come out easily but it has been through the discussion with several people to make sure it was relevant for me and my future. Besides listing the name, I also noted down their personal strength which is beneficial to me and could help me to gain something. The more I discussed my list with other people and the more I listened to them, I realized how important the person on the list would be in the future. Of course the previous ones had little thing to do with the people I was spending my time with but it had everything to do with where I was going and what I was doing with my life. Therefore, in order to make a great move in the future, I had to change my thoughts and as a result, the people I spent time with.
- My Family
Why my first check list is always my family? B’cause it has everything to do with my life. They are people who will love me, pray for me and Insyallah, will always be there when I need them. Without a doubt, my parent is the source of ‘barakah’. Although one day I would achieve everything I dream of, it does not mean anything if they did not bless me. Even if I would succeed in this world, does it work out the same way in the ‘day after tomorrow’? That’s why they are very essential to me.
Then for the second on the check list, I put my friends or my beloved companion. Friends who has same ‘fikrah’ with me, friends who exchange the same thought and mission of life, friends whom I can entrust everything; my life, my career, my family and everything I care the most. That’s why I decided to move from my previous house in Precint 11 to the new house in DPP when I enroll into my fourth year. It doesn’t mean those friends are not dear to me but it is about my future. I have the responsibility to determine my own life and what I will be in the future. Of course, they are all my friends and to be honest, I miss them already especially Akashah.
- Al-Quran & Hadith, Knowledgeable Books
The secret recipe of success of all great Muslim scholars such as Ibnu Sina, Al-Razi and Al-Zahrawi is their dependency on Al-Quran & hadith. They mastered those first, took it as first resource then they mastered the knowledge of medicine, sociology and other field of knowledge. That’s why most of them not only success in medicine but they are the best in philosophy or other minor field of their interest. It is easy to say but to implement it, it won’t be that simple. In other words, it reveals the significance of book. Book for me, is not just the container of knowledge but it is also a great companion. It has the power to ‘treat’ you from stupidity, depression and a lot more. For me, book has become one of the attractions in my life. I never regret to spend hundreds to buy, read and keep them. It is my truly investment for my great future.
- Doctors as Mentor
Becoming a professional in medical field is one of my ambitions. However, the route won’t be easy and needless to say, I need guidance to choose a better path. Therefore, I found the needs for a great mentor in this field. I need advice and guidance from someone who’s been there, already there. In simple words, mentor is someone who tells me what is important and what is not important. Active in Persatuan Perubatan Islam Malaysia and Kelab kesihatan HALUAN will help me to meet great mentors, learn from them and one day, I hope I can get pass all of them.
- Financial Freedom
It is the same in term of financial freedom. I will be a professional in medical field but at the same time, I will gain great wealth, becoming a figure in business and investment and build a legacy. Of course, now it is hard to include myself among them but there must be a way. Besides learning from book, I try to befriend with some people who are really good in property management and banking. It’s hard to understand when they are talking their ‘language’ but slowly I catch up with the financial literacy. It gives me great understanding when I read certain financial and investing books. Warren Buffet said, ‘the first step towards a great success in investment is by understanding the financial literature’. So, I take his words and work for it.
Last and the most essential part for any great and successful man in the history of mankind is the whole-life companion, a wife and the queen of heart. In my check list, it could ascend to the top in no time. Choosing a whole-life companion can determine 80% of your future and life. This is the person who will stay beside me for the rest of my life. Some people say based on the history, ‘behind a great man, there must be a great woman there’. It’s not a lie; you can see that in the history of mankind. It’s sad to see when some people just let their emotion to guide them in choosing these vital people without thinking and considering. They did not think of responsibility and their future, they just think about the short term joy.
Previously, when my parent asked me about this, I stressed to them that I want a person who have the quality prescribed by Rasullullah SAW besides she can work on par with me in any means. Not I’m being choosy or picky but it’s all about my future. Am I supposed to be absent-minded, ignoring it till one day when it doesn’t go well, I will start to regret it? At that time, it’s stupid to regret when I never ever work for it and I never fight for it. I love myself, I love my future and I love my generation, that’s why I will fight for it.
For me to achieve great attainment in medicine, have a great family and lead a better future generation, I need this kind of person. With her, I will have no doubt; because both of us will become better and better as the time goes on. She will become the ‘vitamin’ for me to move forward although the route of our life is hard, and she will be the reason for me to trust and believe for a great future. Insyallah.
“The size of your success is measured by the strength of your desire; the size of your dream and how you handle failure along the way”
Robert T. Kiyosaki, 1999
- How to Get from Where You Are to Where You Want To Be – Jack Canfield
- Rich Dad’s Quadrant Cashflow – Robert T. Kiyosaki